I have to take a second to brag about my husband. He’s such a good sport, he really is. He puts up with me carrying my good camera around to all of our family outings, waits patiently as I lag behind snapping photos, and even handles my sharing of less-than-flattering images with so much grace and dignity. He does great. But if your partner is at all like mine, he’s probably not always thrilled about being in front of the camera, especially for a formal family session. So if you have your session booked and find yourself desperately trying to pump up your significant other about family photos, I’ve got you covered. Here are 3 easy ways to get Dad in front of the camera.
1. Help Him With What to Wear
Okay, so this might seem like an odd tip to start off with, so let me elaborate. Nearly every time I plan an out-of-the-ordinary event with my husband, he’s usually all game until he starts thinking about what he’ll have to wear. The thought of going shopping or wearing tight(ish) pants is like pulling teeth for him. Your partner might be totally into getting dressed up and planning outfits, and if so that’s great! That makes this entire part of it easy and you don’t have to worry. But to be honest, the majority of the guys I photograph definitely give off the ‘please don’t drag me out of the house in something I’ll be uncomfortable in’ vibes, and if that’s your significant other, I’m talking to you.
And I really do mean you.
If you’ve booked a photo session with me, you know that these images are not aimed at capturing perfection. They’re not about getting everyone to pose perfectly for the camera or to tame wild little spirited creatures into perfect submission. This session is about remembering just who your family is at this stage of life and all of the emotions that go with that. So let your partner know that it’s going to be okay for them to be comfortable. Let them know that we’re not going to change their style. We are going to keep it simple and work with what he naturally gravitates towards. If you tell me that your husband doesn’t leave the house without sweat pants, that’s cool…we’ll either go for a super casual in-home session, or we will work hard to at least upgrade to a clean pair of shorts.
If you need additional help planning Dad’s outfit, be sure to check out my inspiration board on Pinterest–if you notice, I tend to keep ideas super neutral and simple. A simple t-shirt and a nice pair of jeans is usually enough. And if you are looking to pick up a few new outfits, here are a few of my favorite stores to shop for basic staples for Dads:
Target
Gap
Zara
J. Crew
Banana Republic
2. Assure him he won’t be humiliated
I think there is definitely a fear with many dads that I as the photographer am out to embarrass them. I see it in their eyes when they arrive. They’re wary. They’re cautious. They’re waiting for me to pose them awkwardly and recreate this image (that’s an amazing picture, btw, and I would be absolutely thrilled to recreate it if anyone’s up for the challenge).
But that’s not what I’m going to do. While I tend to get a few posed and look-at-the-camera shots right at the beginning as everyone’s starting to relax into it, most of the session, it’s completely okay to not look at the camera. In fact, I encourage it. If your significant other is nervous about producing a perfect smile, it’s going to show up and the stress will be what shines through in the images. That’s not what I want. I would much rather let him be himself not looking at me. So let him look at the kids. Let him look at you. The majority of our session is going to be spent following you guys along as you play and interact as a normal family.
Which brings me to one last point on this one. Since I always love to showcase each family’s personality, let’s make sure we are doing things that you would normally do. If you’re not a frolic-in-the-fields kind of family, we don’t have to do that! If your husband isn’t a rough and tumble with the kids kind of guy, let’s figure out what he does love to do and figure out ways to incorporate it. Does he play chess with them? Neat–let’s go set up at an outdoor table downtown and get a game going. Does he build model planes? Let’s clear out a corner of the garage and get a setup happening (garage light is amazing, btw). Does he bond over fishing? Let’s go! If you want to make memories of your family right now, let’s figure out how to capture the true essence of what makes your family uniquely you.
Which leads us to the last tip to get Dad in front of the camera..
3. Make sure you’re having fun, too.
This one’s for you, Mama. I want to assure you of a few things. I know you have invested in a session, so there’s usually a lot of stress that goes on behind the scenes. Getting kids dressed in outfits they may not want to wear (see tip 1). Wrangling them into the car. Dealing with meltdowns. Threatening to take away the planned ice cream trip if they don’t behave. I’m a mom. I get it.
So as a photographer and a fellow mom, let me just assure you. It’s going to be okay. Even if things don’t go as planned. Even if your kid’s outfit rips on the way to the session and you have to stop to get a new one (no sweat–it happens). Even if your kid gets out of the car and does this the entire time. Take a deep breath. It is going to be okay.
Because here’s the thing. No family is perfect, and that’s not what we’re striving for here. It’s not what I seek in my images. I seek to capture memories and stories. Lots of stories. And sometimes little ones are unpredictable. And sometimes they are crazy. And you know what? That just makes more stories that you can look back on and laugh at years from now. So yes, your child may wake up on the wrong side of the bed and hate everything the day of your session. But you’re off the hook because we aren’t expecting them to be perfect. We’re expecting them to be themselves, which is just what they are being.
So allow yourself to take a deep breath and just go with the flow. Try to see the humor in every situation–laugh out loud, even! If you are totally calm and relaxed, chances are the rest of your family (your SO included) will be as well. We moms are magic that way–we totally bestow our moods on the rest of the family instantly. If we are having fun with the session, our chances of being able to get Dad in front of the camera in the future will go up exponentially.
I hope these tips help just a bit as you plan for your session. Everything else aside, it’s such a wonderful thing to have images of your kids with their Dad in them.
Be sure to leave your comments below and get in touch if you are ready to start planning your own session today!
Christina Freeman is an on-location lifestyle photographer based in Anna, TX and serving McKinney, Plano, Frisco, Wylie, Lucas, Celina and other Collin County communities. She seeks to photograph the fun and messy moments that connect us all in our ordinary lives, from the very beginning to the very end. Click the link below if you have loved everything you have seen so far and would love to start a conversation.